Lament of the Lost Lamb
by Starsabove0oru
Summary: What if someone told you that you weren't supposed to exist? What if you were only half a person? What if you found out that your only purpose was to assimilate into someone else? What would you do? Roxas' feelings before he unites with Sora. Songfic.


**Hi everyone. How goes it? So this is a one-shot/songfic about Roxas, about the mental battle he rages with himself before he integrates into Sora. Now, I know in the game he doesn't take this long to decide, but I know I would take a little time if I was him. But then again, I'm not a noble, loving, ever-so-cute blonde like he is. **

**Disclaimer: The song used is called "The Kill", owned by30 Seconds to Mars. I don't own Roxas, Axel does ((wink)). **

**Oh yeah, this is dedicated to Serenity Denied. Because your story ((The Paopu Predicament)) gave me the inspiration to write this about Roxas. You rock! Lol even tho I don't know you. **

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Sometimes… I don't think I can take it… I don't know what to do. I try, I try so hard to do what's right, but I'm lost. I'm lost on the inside. I wish someone would help me, someone would show me the way.

**What if I wanted to break?  
Laugh it all off in your face**

Roxas stood, his sky blue eyes glued to the ground under him. He was lost and he hated that feeling. How long would he be able to take it? Would everyone know? Who would look at him the same? No… they would only see Sora, a reflection of him. That's all he would ever be.

**What would you do?  
What if I fell to the floor?**

_I am nobody. I exist for no one and no one exists for me. I have no purpose, my existence is meaningless. I long for significance, but I shall never be. I am nobody. I am Sora's Nobody. _

**Couldn't take this anymore  
What would you do, do, do?**

Tears filled his melancholy eyes and dropped to the white floor. He couldn't believe that this was his destiny. It seemed that he had lived such a normal life. He spent every moment with Hayner, Pence and Olette. He had enemies, like Seifer. He was a normal kid that went on adventures, rode on trains, and ate ice cream. So why… why did all of this happen to him?

**Come break me down  
Bury me, bury me  
I am finished with you**

_What about Namine? She's gone forever. The darkness stole her, the same darkness that now threatens to overtake me. Will she keep her promise? Was she telling the truth? Can I trust anyone anymore? My entire world has been shattered. _

**What if I wanted to fight  
Beg for the rest of my life**

"Roxas… Nobodies like us are only half a person. You won't disappear! You'll be whole!"

"No, you WON'T disappear! You'll---"

"Roxas! We will meet again. And then we can talk about everything. I may not know it's you, and you may not know it's me. But we will meet again. Someday soon. I promise!"

**What would you do? (do, do)  
You say you wanted more**

Roxas finally lifted his head up, Namine's words giving him confidence. He stared at the sleeping, floating Sora before him; the Sora that would not be whole without him, the Sora that would not awaken without him. So maybe… he did have a purpose?

**What are you waiting for?  
I'm not running from you**

'_Yeah. Your purpose is not to exist anymore. No one wants you, they all want Sora. That's why you have to make the biggest sacrifice of your life and everyone else gets to live on happily. You don't get to exist because you're worthless. Why should you listen to that creep? Why should you have to die for someone else to live? Is he really that more important than you are? Does that seem fair to you at all? Leave this place, Roxas. You don't have to do this.'_

**Come break me down  
Bury me, bury me  
I am finished with you**

'I don't?' Roxas looked around for the voice that had suddenly popped into his head. But he saw no one. 'Then… what will happen to Sora?' _I get to exist… That's good, right?_ But for some reason, he didn't feel all that great. Something wasn't right. Something… didn't fit.

**Look in my eyes  
You're killing me, killing me  
All I wanted was you**

Roxas remembered… all the dreams he had, all his memories of Sora and of himself in Organization XIII. He remembered how much Sora had sacrificed to save the ones he loved, to be with them again. Would all his hard work be thwarted just because Roxas was acting a little selfish?

**I tried to be someone else  
But nothing seemed to change**

Sora was strong. He fought the Heartless and defeated Ansem. He had been through a lot. Losing and finding Kairi, losing Riku to the darkness, even losing Donald and Goofy for a short while. But he had never, ever done anything without regard to others. But still… Roxas hated him. Because deep down, he knew what he was about to do. That entitled him to be a tad annoyed, didn't it?

**I know now, this is who I really am inside  
Finally found myself**

Sora was a good person. He deserved to live. And maybe… maybe Roxas would live on inside Sora. Maybe he wouldn't be completely gone. Maybe Namine was right. Yeah, Namine was like Sora. She was good, too. So he would do it.

**Fighting for a chance  
I know now, this is who I really am**

'Forget you!' Roxas mentally shouted at the confusing voice, the voice that was trying to deter him away from his goal, his purpose. 'I know what my purpose is now! I am a part of Sora and… I-I won't disappear!'

**Come break me down  
Bury me, bury me  
I am finished with you, you, you**

'Fine then, do what you want.' The voice answered, almost in a sad tone. Roxas, in spite of his situation, smirked. Roxas knew that the stupid voice had no control over him. He knew what the right thing to do was.

**Look in my eyes  
You're killing me, killing me  
All I wanted was you**

Roxas stared hard at Sora. They really did look alike. They could have been twins, in another life of course. Reincarnation, perhaps? Roxas smiled to himself. If only, if only. But he was ready now, ready to face his destiny. He knew.

**Come break me down  
Break me down  
Break me down**

Roxas took a deep breath and prepared his mind, body, and soul to do the bravest, most selfless thing any being could ever do. He smiled sadly as he felt his time run out…

**What if I wanted to break?**

"Sora… you're lucky. Looks like my summer vacation is… over."

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**So... that's it. Please review, pretty please! **


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